Instead of saving what I write on my iPad and laptop, I thought what better way to share my chronicles. Usually, a new year brings so many new resolutions, blah blah and all that stuff. But 2010 was one of the most interesting years of my life. I did my part, you did your part, we did our parts and that part of 2010 completed. But one thing really caught my eye as I listened, watched and reacted. I started “stepping out of my own skin”. Through the years I have mastered the art of giving and sharing. Not just because the bible says you should do so but because it has always been a part of me, though I always remembered that when you give, God blesses you abundantly and wholesomely.
Don’t get me wrong, I have been giving with all of my heart and demanding nothing in return. I also grew to share stuff that I wasn’t so comfortable sharing, but as a way of being courteous, I thought, “what the heck” it won’t hurt to share though I still never demanded anything in return. All this is College life with a dose of 10% personal life. Hah! I just can’t believe the good I did at the end of the day for people I barely knew. Sharing… giving… giving… giving… oh my so much giving, just to put a smile on someone’s face, I would shop for myself, and remember you, and you and you too. When I’d get back, my little dolls would be waiting excitedly, a reflection of mama finally coming home with candy at the end of the day. Generous and kind I felt until it finally hit me.
WHY AM I THE ONE ALWAYS GIVING TO THOSE WHO CAN AFFORD IT, YET THEY NEVER GIVE ME EVEN A SHILLING! OR THE LEAST SAY THANK YOU.
Seriously, I stopped and asked myself this one day. When “A” needs to borrow money I give them, yet they never payback until I ask them to. When “Z” needs a pair of something’s I always give them, yet they wait for me to go and beg for my items back. Hello? Is this what it has come down to? I am the lion who catches my prey and you are the vulture who feeds off my hard work. Worse of all, the day I refuse to give or share anything it beckons as a sin on our manmade bible and whispers start.
Umh… so much for my kindness hah? It’s really funny once you think about it.
Here’s what I decided to do to maintain my sanity:
- Only give to those who need it the most
- Stop being considerate to those who don’t need it
- Take back what I have given or what when one takes without asking*
- Stop lending money at all costs
- Stop buying gifts for those who have never given back
- The art borrowing will gracefully come to end(my clothes, shoes, accessories, etc
- And to many more resolutions
Written: 03/10/2011